The duty of men to live with their wives honorably and with kindness

بسم الله والحمد لله والصلاة والسلام على رسول الله ، وبعد

وَيْلٌ لِّلْمُطَفِّفِينَ ﴿١﴾ الَّذِينَ إِذَا اكْتَالُوا عَلَى النَّاسِ يَسْتَوْفُونَ ﴿٢﴾ وَإِذَا كَالُوهُمْ أَو وَّزَنُوهُمْ يُخْسِرُونَ ﴿٣﴾ أَلَا يَظُنُّ أُولَـٰئِكَ أَنَّهُم مَّبْعُوثُونَ ﴿٤﴾ لِيَوْمٍ عَظِيمٍ ﴿٥﴾ يَوْمَ يَقُومُ النَّاسُ لِرَبِّ الْعَالَمِينَ ﴿٦﴾

{Woe to Al-Mutaffifeen * Those who, when they have to receive by measure from men, demand full measure, * And when they have to give by measure or weight to men, give less than due. * Think they not that they will be resurrected (for reckoning), * On a Great Day, * The Day when (all) mankind will stand before the Lord of the `Aalameen?} [Surah al-Mutaffifeen (83): 1-6]

Shaikh Ibn al-`Uthaymeen رحمه الله said:

❝This similitude which Allaah تعالى mentioned in this Aayah, regarding giving full measure and full weight, is mentioned by way of example. Based on this, anything which resembles it can be related to it. Anyone who demands that his rights be paid in full while he himself does not pay the rights which are due upon him is included in this Aayah.

Example: the husband demands that his wife should give him his rights in full, without any negligence or laxity on her part in regards to his rights. But when it is his turn to fulfill her rights, he is negligent and careless, and does not give her what is due for her. And how many women complain about this behavior from their husbands – and Allaah’s refuge is sought.

There are many a women, her husband demands from her that she fulfills his rights in full, but he himself does not fulfill her rights in full. Rather, he diminishes her rights by great extent - regarding spending on her and living with her honorably and with kindness.

Oppression against others is more severe than a man oppressing himself in regards to the rights of Allaah. When a man oppresses himself regarding the rights of Allaah, he is under Allaah’s Will. So as long as it is not Shirk (or Kufr), then Allaah may forgive him if He تعالى Wills, or He تعالى will punish him if He تعالى Wills. But as for the rights of other people, then no doubt they will be paid off (from his good deeds).

This is why the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said: ❝Do you know who is the bankrupt?❞ They said: The bankrupt among us is one who has neither money with him nor any property. He صلى الله عليه وسلم said: ❝The real bankrupt of my Ummah would be he who would come on the Day of Resurrection with Salaah (Prayers), Saum (Fasting) and Sadaqah (Charity), (but he will find himself bankrupt on that Day as he will have exhausted the good deeds) because he reviled others, brought calumny against others, unlawfully devoured the wealth of others, shed the blood of others and beat others; so his good deeds would be credited to the account of those (who suffered at his hand). If his good deeds fall short to clear the account, then their sins would be entered in his account and he would be thrown in the (Hell) Fire.❞ [Saheeh Muslim (6251)]❞

[Tafseer of Juz `Amma of Shaikh Ibn al-Uthaymeen]